Day 21: NYE 2018 Reflection

At the start of this year, for the first time, we did a 2018 Family Bucket List aimed at allowing us to grow as individuals and as a family, and experience some special things in between. As we wish this year farewell, I thought I'd report. back on how well (or not) we did at our first attempt.

There are couple things we really aced. We got into it immediately, and whether by habit or purposeful intention, we stuck at it throughout the year. This would include: going to bed on time; eating less bread (the adults, that is; the kids eat plenty bread to the point of is bordering on problematic); seeing a movie with the kids each holiday; giving back by donating clothes / bedding / household items of not only old, but also just not needed or being used; sharing hugs all the time; limiting tv time to limited weekend and holiday slots; and praying together as a family in the morning.

There were some things that kind of caught us by surprise. For example: being mindful about being more respectful, and practising not raising our voices. I realise that this was more for me than anyone else. My expectation has always been for my kids to exercise both of these, but I forget that (a) they are small children who break the rules all the time, and more importantly (b) they will learn this from me. So I have really tried to be more calm (of course I have many moments when things reach boiling point, and my temper joins it), and remember that my kids need my respect and consideration too.

The big ticket items we ticked off were: traveling overseas and visiting The Grahams and Webers. I feel it's important that, when we made up this bucket list, we didn't have the funds to go. This was added in faith, and we had plenty obstacles in getting there, but how wonderful is this holiday we are on? It's God's lavish grace and favour that has brought us here, and we are so very grateful.

Of course there were also times we fell off the bus in a big way - like: sending Luke and Isla a postcard each month (we didn't even manage one!); doing more exercise / prom walks (although I did start swimming in October); growing a herb garden (who was I kidding? I love the idea, but I don't really have the space or the patience); and learn more about nature and animals ( I was relying on Zac for that). I'm keen for us to try some of these again rather than just give them up altogether, so watch this space!

I'm determined to have us camp, and explore more of SA, so be sure to catch that and more on 2019's List in January!

Day 16: Pause

I seem to have a Christmas / Holiday hangover. Not literally, like alcohol induced. I just seem to have had this trip and all the activities of the last few days catch up with me, and in addition to feeling shattered, the scratch-and-burn in my throat suggests I may be getting ill too. It should come as no surprise then that I almost didn't make it out of my pjs today. I took full advantage of not having anything really pressing to do, and decided instead to have a bit of a pause - in life, and on the blog.


I'm thinking about... how unusual this Christmas has been. While it's not our first away from home, it is the first time that my parents have not have us, Ash and her family, or Dom around. It's actually such an uncommon occurrence, that we have just decided to have Christmas in January instead. Having said that though: my parents sure do seem to be enjoying the peace and quiet!


I'm watching... a helluva lot of telly! I never really watch back home. If anything, there is just sport playing in the background sometimes. Here though, there is Sky TV and Netflix, and a host of catch up series and movies, sports tournaments and a host of other entertainment options. Today I watched some cricket, a couple old episode of Hawaii Five-0, and started the second series of The Good Doctor. It was a good day, and my eyes are probably square.


I'm listening to... the greatest Christmas playlists ever! I really do enjoy the seasonal music, especially the different interpretations and versions of songs. On my own, I don't have the time to put a decent playlist together, so it certainly helps that aunty Lynne, uncle Eddie and Spotify have already done so for me! Currently, my one of my favourites (although it's a bit of a throwback) is: A Strange Way to Save the World.

I'm loving... being here in the UK with my family to visit my family. It's been four years since we've seen most of the Weber family here, and also four years since we were last able to travel. Since then we have added two kids to the mix, which has made it considerably more busy (and logistically complex) to get around, but I truthfully wouldn't want to do this any other way. I can see how what my kids are experiencing now - being able to travel, and getting to know their extended family - is forming precious memories they'll be able to treasure as they get older. And it's wonderful to be in a home away from home.


I'm busy... procrastinating about the work that I need to have done before I return to the office. I know I have to do it, and I know I should do it soon so that I don't worry about it every day. Still, I don't get around to doing it. It's going to ruin what's left of my stay if I don't get onto it, fast. Tomorrow. I hope.


I'm going to... see my bestie in Ireland next week! When as friends you are separated on two opposite sides of the world, it can sometimes be hard to maintain a friendship like you want to. Tarrin and I have been apart in this way for over seven years now, so when you consider that we last saw each other three years ago, this reunion is overdue and much anticipated. I cannot wait to just be, together!


I'm battling with... some anxiety again. I had a bit of a wobble just before leaving on holiday, and it's taking a while to get back on track. I feel peaceful right now, but I know a lot of that has to do with the fact that I am no where near when my anxiety often originates. I can already feel the rising apprehension at having to go back home and face my demons. I am getting better though. I am so much more aware of what's going on, and how I'm reacting and responding to everything, and I am determined to continue the progress I have been making this year.


I'm resolving to... make the most of the rest of this holiday. That includes:
Being present with my family so that we can embark on adventures and make memories together.
Soaking up every minute I'm able to spend with my friends and family while we are here.
Not become obsessed about the lack of healthy choices I have made in terms of foot and fitness lately.
Be kind.

Day 15: Boxing Day Traditions

Being from South Africa, it is not uncommon to find many people celebrating Boxing Day (the day after Christmas Day) on the beach. The weather in the Southern Hemisphere is usually decidedly warm, and spending a long day of relaxation at the seaside sounds like a great idea. Before spending my first Christmas in the UK, I had no idea that people around these parts do something similar.

Did you know?
In an event called the Boxing Day Dip people all over Europe brave the cold weather and water, and take a dip in the frigid sea - in fancy dress costume, no less - as part of a charity fundraiser.

They say "when in Rome, do as the Romans do", so we went to the beach today. Not for a Boxing Day Dip though! It turns out those who don't do the Boxing Day Dip do more of a Boxing Day Costal Walk, so that's what we opted for.

Late this morning we head out to Wells, a picturesque kind of port village, on the northern coast of Norfolk. It was pretty chilly and misty out, so even though we were dressed pretty warmly, we didn't head onto the actual beach. Rather we hung around the little harbour area before heading to the local arcade centre. It was the first time we were all out together: the Webers, Tim's girlfriend, and us, and we had a good time competing against each other and the machines, all collecting tickets for the kids to get a nice momento. And they did! Between them they managed to exchange their tickets for a Rubik's Cube, two Spiderman bouncy balls, and a bottle of bubbles each.

Of course, by the time we were done there, it was getting dark, and although we'd promised the boys some ice cream (they've asked every day), we could not find an open cafe. So we head home - to do the other Boxing Day tradition: eat left over roast and trifle! No one complained.

Day 14: So This is Christmas

Before last year, my children had zero interest in Santa and other Christmas “commercialism” (for lack of a better term). In fact, they had never actually received gifts from him – or us, for that matter. They knew that it was a festive holiday, they knew about the Christmas story, and they knew that they may receive gifts from family and friends, and that was enough.

Then last year, the whole year, they wanted bikes, and suddenly Zac was five-and-a-half, and intrigued by the mystery of Santa and his reindeer. We had to post letters, and on Christmas Eve set out cookies and milk for his visit. And when he left footprints in the house, Zac was quick to mention that he was a little messy. By all indications, Santa was a living part of our lives.

This year it was even more so with Sam on the bandwagon as well. They wrote their letters, careful to include that they would not be at home, and Santa should please bring their gifts to our holiday location in England. We even visited a local Santa representative – because, obviously, the real Santa doesn’t come out until Christmas Eve (the logic of a very smart six-year-old); set out additional carrot treats for the reindeer, and tracked Santa’s movements on the internet before bed.

There’s no denying: Christmas morning with young kids who are engrossed in the Wonder, is something special. Even without the snow (that we knew probably wasn’t coming), waking to a silvery blanket of frost on the windows and the ground was pretty magical. But I was also very aware of the fact that we can so easily become caught up in it all: focusing on expensive gifts, extravagant decorations, and making a savior out of Santa - and miss the real sentiment and meaning of Christmas.

Fortunately, Santa seems to be on the same page. He did not bring everything the kids wanted, and so he left a note explaining the real reasons why. He also reminded them to be thankful for all they have, consider those who were not as fortunate as them, enjoy their time with family and friends, and always remember the greatest Christmas gift of all: Jesus.

So as we spend this special day with our loved ones in England, and think fondly of those spread out all over the world, we wish you a blessed Christmas. We pray that everyone would know the deep love of Jesus Christ, and the peace and joy that He brings.

Day 13: Remembering Christmas Eve 2008

Christmas Eve is my favourite day of the year. It has been for a while, and I'm not really sure how it started, but it is now also a bit of an anniversary for us.

Today, 10 years ago, Andel and I got engaged. I remember we were both still working in the health and wellness industry, at different clubs. That was back in the day when neither of us took holidays over Christmas, and opted instead to work the shifts no one else wanted to, knowing that things were quiet and days were shorter.

Christmas Eve in 2008 was obviously one of those shorter shift days, because I remember Andel asking me to a late lunch. I left work early to meet him at the flat he was sharing with our friend, Adair. When I got there the living room had been beautifully set out for an indoor picnic of sorts. I remember they had this low coffee table - and scatter cushions - that worked perfectly for the occasion. I don't recall too many other details though. I just know at some point, Andel was having this serious conversation with me, and then asked me to marry him.

The rest of the proceedings are a bit of a blur. It wasn't totally unexpected; we had started talking about marriage prior to that. It was still a big change though, and. I remember sending my sisters a text saying something like, "I think I'm going to faint; I just got engaged." Is that cheesy or what?!

I'll tell you though: it was quite something relaying the story to the boys today. I realised that as adults sometimes it's easy to relay stories of significant events with these comprehensive terms that kind of cover all the detail and yet are void of emotion. When I told my friends and family about our engagement, that was all I had to say: that we got engaged. I didn't have to explain how we felt or what we said to each other. As my children asked me questions like "what does engagement mean", I found myself having to express out loud things that most of us keep quiet. The things that, quite honestly, we sometimes forget with time and pride.

While these matters remain private, as I was explaining things in the simplest terms I could come up with, I recognised an opportunity to teach my children about authenticity, vulnerability, and love. And because they already know first hand how imperfect both Andel and I are, I could it free of judgment and pressure. I could include God's design for us to be in relationship with others; the blessing of being part of families; and His grace that protects and provides.

In a world where we often adult with difficulty and reluctance, I hope that even our little story can give them something of their own story to look forward to one day...

Day 11: Meeting Santa

Today we took the kids to meet Santa. It was a unique experience.

1. Did you know that in the UK you have to pay to see Santa? Coming from home where this is one thing you don't have to pay for, I thought it quite strange at first. I also felt terrible for the fact that aunty Lynne had purchased this tickets for the kids (because you have to book as well). But how do you tell your kids you've changed you mind when you're already at the entrance to the Grotto?

2. Santa was on a break when we got there. This left enough time for Zac's mind to start working, and for him to ask me how it was possible that Santa could be at so many places at the same time for people to meet him. I had to think fast, and fortunately satisfied him with my answer of these men simply being representatives of the real Santa because he was busy preparing for his trip on Christmas Eve.

3. We had to see Santa at a Garden Centre because all the shopping centres were fully booked. It turns out there are some benefits to being at a smaller place. Because people are less likely to come to these places as a first option, they generally offer other things that make it as - if not more - appealing than the opposition. One of these things were that the kids were able to have their faces painted by a fantastic artist - free of charge! After some vacillating Sam chose a bunny. I didn't have the heart to tell him he may have gotten the festive holidays mixed up. Zac, never wanting to look a free gift horse in the mouth, took the option that involved the most facial coverage, and landed up with a swan lake mural on his face.

4. The kids got gifts! And suddenly the price to pay to visit Santa didn't seem quite as ridiculous anymore. The parents enter the grotto with their kids because it's actually a closed off room where kids can speak to Santa privately. Our Santa was great. He asked the kids about their letter (that they had only posted a few days before), and spoke to them about their behaviour (it was like he'd read my mind). He then gave them each a gift from his sack. My kids were so surprised and thankful, they literally jumped on his lap to hug him. Except Bayley, of course. Bayley was having none of this Santa-stranger separating her from me, and promptly let everyone know about it.

After the grotto visit we took the kids for a light lunch, and they played in the playground. They were literally the only kids there because it was bloody cold - but they had fun all the same. It's definitely been one of their better days. I only wish I had threatened them with Santa sooner - this is only going to work two more days.

Day 8 - 10: Wales

Everyone loves a good road trip, and we are no different. One of the things we were looking forward to, coming here, was the cross-country trip from the East of England to Cardiff in Wales to see my cousin Christopher.

On Wednesday, Uncle Ed finished work early, and we head off – him, aunty Lynne, and us. The five-hour journey was quite pleasant actually, thanks mostly to the mobile theatre uncle Ed had set up for the boys so that they could watch movies almost all the way!

We got to our accommodation in Cardiff around 20h00, in the pouring rain, and we were welcomed by Christopher who lives a couple streets away. It was so good chatting and catching up.

The next day we explored the city. First, we went to the natural history museum, something the boys had been looking forward to ever since aunty Lynne told them about the dinosaur display. Then we went over to Winter Wonderland, an outdoor carnival-type set up of food trucks, games, stalls and an outdoor ice rink. Zac, who has been wanting to go on the Bumper Cars for forever, finally got to go along with his dad, uncle Ed and Sam.

It was while we were there that it started raining again, so we made our way into a shopping centre where we could walk around under cover. There also happened to be an Adventure Golf place there, so the boys played a double round while the girls had warm drinks. 

When we left, it was dark, despite being only 17h00. I still can’t really get used to that. It’s like my body automatically assumes it’s nighttime, and then wants to go to bed. If only that worked on the boys! They were awake playing with Chris way into the night before heading to bed.

Friday morning was dry. We took it slow, before saying goodbye to Chris, and heading back to Norfolk. Needless to say, we all had a good snooze on the road, and are now refreshed for the weekend!

Day 5

Well, yesterday's promise of snow didn't render much, and today the sun is shining again.

We started the day heading to One Church with aunty Lynne and uncle Eddie. They had a really fun Christmas family service with lots of activities including a Christmas quiz (you know, for some harmless competition between family). It reminded us a lot of our church back in Cape Town, and the kids felt right at home.

Seeing as though we were already in the City, we head straight for the market after church. There were stalls in wooden cabins lining the walkways, lights all over the streets, a brass band playing carols, a choir singing, people walking around with their mulled wine... I'm not even joking: it felt like I was in a Christmas movie (cheesy, I know, but also really magical, actually). There also happened to be a Mechanical Circus exhibition close by, so we took the kids to see that as well.

We eventually head home after 15h00 for a late lunch, and spent the rest of the day relaxing at home. Aunty Lynne and the boys are on holiday now (it's only uncle Eddie still heading to school for a few days) so I know we'll at least start tomorrow with a lay-in!

Day 4

Today was cold. Like 2 degrees, real feel of -5 degrees kind of cold. In fact, it was so cold, we had a snow warning for today. And we nearly got some too. We had a fine sprinkling that quickly turned into sleet, before the heavens opened with rain - the first time I've experienced rain in Norfolk, I think.

Because of the weather forecast for today, we spent most of the morning indoors doing some housekeeping. We did the laundry (thank goodness for tumble drying) and tied up a bit. Uncle Eddie had gone to play golf, so we waited until he got back before we head out anywhere.

We took a short trip into the city later the afternoon, but it was cut short when not long after 16h00 - in absolute darkness - that rain storm started. It meant we opted to head home - but not before Andel was able to take advantage of Nike's 50%-off sale, and get himself and Bayley a pair of trainers each!

The kids are a little disappointed that they haven't had any snow yet, but all was not lost today: in the spirit of Christmas, we spent the evening huddled together on the sofa with hot drinks, watching Michael Buble's Christmas Special, and a few Christmas movies. It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

Day 3

Today Bayley and I went to school with Aunty Lynne while Andel stayed home with the boys. I had agreed, even before we arrived, to visit Great Yarmouth Charter Academy, largely because of the incredible changes that have taken place there over the last year or so.

(For more information on this, just search Google; it's quite a story!)

To many GYCA would seem like a sort of prison. Admittedly, compared to schools of today, the rules that they enforce seem strict. However, upon closer inspection, they are very much like school rules were when I was a scholar. Anyway, these kids - even on the last day of school - are so well behaved and respectful. They were not even distracted by Bayley who was walking around the classroom demanding their attention.

Speaking of which: Bayley seems to be on the up. The pimples she has had around her mouth have dried up, and appear to be clearing. Also, she started eating today which is massive as she's basically been like a newborn nursing all the time. We took her to the pharmacist today, to see if they had anything to say about what could give her to speed her recovery and make her more comfortable. Even he said she's looking great, is chirpy, and will probably be right as rain after the weekend. So that's what we're hoping for.

It has been wonderful catching up with the family over dinners and coffee. It's something I've really missed. Now that we've had a chance to settle in, and Bayley is doing better, we are looking forward to doing some exploring soon too.

Day 2

Bayley seems to be settling. Thank the Lord!

Still, we opted not to head out anywhere today. She has some sores inside her mouth, and it's pretty painful for her a lot of the time, so we don't want to force her into the cold when it isn't necessary. Also, the Webers are still at work this week, so we don't mind chilling at the house, and saving the day trips for when they're able to come along with us.

So we had a bit of a pyjama day. I did some work, and the boys have binged watched Peppa Pig and Paw Patrol, and are probably in need of a good detox soon! It was a restful day which I think, given the madness of the first half of the week, was much needed.

The weather has gotten cooler. Initially when we arrived I didn't really feel cold at all. It's certainly turning now. In fact, there has even been a warning for snow over the weekend. And I happen to know two little boys who would be overjoyed with that. So we wait and see.

Day 1

Last night was a rough one. Bayley, who traveled with a secondary reaction to a vaccination, was not happy, and screamed a lot of the time - which is totally unusual for her. So today we tried to take it easy, and stay near the house.

The highlight of our day was taking a long stroll through the village. It's so beautiful and quiet here. There's something so invited about the large open spaces, quaint houses, fresh air, and the absence of city life, for at least as far as you can see and hear. The kids welcomed the walk, and didn't even ask to be carried! Bayley slept in the buggy, and the boys - thankfully - resisted the temptation to jump into every muddy puddle!

Sam, however, could not resist helping himself to a treat at the local store. We just stopped in there briefly to look around, but when we got home, to our horror, Sam revealed the treat in his pocket. Needless to say: he will be learning a valuable lesson tomorrow when he returns the treat and apologises to the owner.

We're off for an early night, hoping that it goes better than the last!

The Journey: Cape Town to London

Four years ago, when we last made a trip over the ocean, I worked a full day before heading – rather rushed, if I’m honest – to the airport to catch the flight. I swore I would never do it again. But, much like with childbirth, the mind remembers only the sweet introductions and burst of love; it forgets the pains it took to get there. And so, Andel and I still had work, and Zac still had an orientation day, before we left.

Lately, Cape Town’s weather has been welomingly cooler than usual. Of course yesterday, when we were leaving for the UK, and hoping to wear our warm and heavy clothing, it was hot. The fact that we went sak en pak with additional things in hand may or may not have contributed to one very overweight suitcase. Thankfully respect and kindness goes a long way – at least far enough to turn a gracefully blind eye to an extra 1kg in each bag (after we had repacked everything). Too bad it didn’t extend to the two jars of Caliente Chili Bombs that we had to leave behind.

At this point it seems fitting to mention that we managed to successfully put all our luggage (for 5 people) in two large suitcases and a small on-board backpack! Thank the Lord; because once touching down at Heathrow our movements included taking the Picadilly Tube to Holborn, then changing to the Central Line (where there are no lifts or escalators, just saying), and then taking a train from Liverpool Street to Norwich. I’m sure you can picture it: Andel with Bayley in a carry-pack on his back, me with a backpack on mine, and each of us dragging one suitcase and one boy by the hand.

To be fair though: the boys travelled wonderfully. I don’t think we had even takeoff from Cape Town when I already concluded that even if we had just flown into London and back out again thereafter, it would have been worth it to see the unbridled excitement and sheer joy they could not contain. Between being about to see all the starts (and planets, apparently) out the window, having an individual tv of all their favourite shows, and being able to order things from the stewards, they may have thought that they died and went to heaven.

We are now in Norfolk with the Webers. We are tired, and the kids are a little over-stimulated, but we are so happy to be here. Let the holidays begin!