At some point during the night - I can't tell you exactly when or how because I can't remember much about it - Sam rolled out of the bed. There was a quick cry, an even quicker reaction from me (too bad it was too late to avoid the accident in the first place), and then some healing cuddles and prayer. I felt - still do feel - absolutely terrible.
Since then I cannot shake the desire - the need - to post about it. Mostly, because, surely, this must happen to most, if not all, parents? And yet no one speaks about it! I know it's not post-worthy in the greater scheme of portraying our parental prowess, still, the feelings of absolutely incompetence, loneliness and guilt are not ones I think should be experienced alone.
This is not the first time it's happened to me. Zac took his first tumble almost exactly 3 years ago. For some reason I posted about it then, and thank goodness I did, because if no one else is going to come clean, I did. And when I read that post just now, it was just what I needed to hear to know that I will be ok.
So to the Mom whose baby has taken a tumble...
You are not alone. We have all had these accidents, and that's exactly what they are: accidents. I know that you were probably tired/distracted/multi-tasking, and you most likely usually take all the necessary precautions to avoid these things. It's alright.
I know you feel incredibly guilty. Don't feel condemned. God's grace covers and sustains us. Don't believe the lie that you are not good enough. You have been created for this, and especially selected to parent your child/ren. There isn't anyone, anywhere who can do a better job for them than what you can do.
Pick yourself up. Wipe away those tears. One day this will be a distant memory for both of you.
Embrace the gift of the present. Don't give up. Be at peace.
Embrace the gift of the present. Don't give up. Be at peace.
"Now may the Lord of peace himself give you peace at all times in every way" 2 Thess 3:16
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